What is the funniest joke you've been told that you still think about to this day?

At that point, a woman enters, stands at the other end, and orders a drink. Brian, the bartender says, “Oh, Vicky, it’s going to be a long, tiring night.”

Two blokes are sitting at the end of a bar. One orders a drink. The other one says, “From your voice, I’d guess you’re from Ireland.”

“So am I. And from where in Ireland might you be?” says the first.

What is the sluttiest thing your wife has ever done?

“Mother Mary. And on what street in Dublin did you live?”

“Now why would you be saying that, Brian?”

“As did I,” the first bloke says, getting very excited. “And what year did you graduate?”

Do people have to be a pastor to baptize?

“Well, to St. Mary’s, of course.”

The first fellow is now beside himself. “The good Lord must be smiling on us. Imagine that the two of us should be meeting here, having grown up on the same street, gone to the same school, and graduated in the same year.”

“Oh, let me see now. ’Twas 1964, it was.”

What is the most unwatchable movie you have sat through?

“Faith and begorrah. What a small world. So did I. And to what school would you school would you have been going?”

“A lovely little area of the old part of town, McCleary Street.”

I’m from Dublin, I am.”

How often do prisoners try to escape from jail/prison, and how many of them succeed?

“The Murphy twins are drunk again.”

“Yes, that I am,” says the second.